Confidence is often dressed up as something to be kept in check, softened at the edges, and balanced carefully with humility. But what if that balance is not always the right formula for success? In a space where conventional advice is repeated without question, one entrepreneur has pushed back with a perspective that feels both uncomfortable and honest. His take challenges the idea that humility alone can carry ambition, especially in environments where the odds are rarely in your favour.
Anupam Mittal, founder of Shaadi.com, recently shared a blunt perspective on social media, arguing that the commonly repeated advice of not having an ego can be misleading. According to him, the idea sounds appealing on the surface but often creates confusion and internal conflict, especially for individuals trying to build something meaningful in competitive environments.
Why can humility be limiting?
He pointed out that the world rarely operates in a supportive or encouraging way. Markets are indifferent, competition is intense, and rejection is often the default response. In such a setting, he suggested that what is often labelled as humility can turn into a limiting mindset, one that discourages people from pushing forward with conviction. For founders and professionals alike, especially those trying to grow in stagnant or challenging spaces, this approach may not always serve them well.
Mittal drew from his own journey to explain this perspective. He shared that he faced multiple failures before finding success, and that it was not restraint or excessive self-doubt that carried him through those phases. Instead, it was a strong belief in his own ideas, even when they did not align with conventional logic or external validation. That sense of self-assurance, which some might interpret as ego or even arrogance, played a crucial role in helping him persist when circumstances were not in his favour.
He described this mindset as a necessary force, something that keeps individuals moving when they are up against resistance. It is the drive to prove doubters wrong, the confidence to believe that one’s perspective holds value, and the willingness to stand firm even when the broader system does not immediately validate it. Rather than dismissing ego entirely, he framed it as something that can be channelled productively when balanced with effort and resilience.
At the same time, his view does not dismiss the role of humility altogether. Instead, it places it in a different context, suggesting that life itself has a way of humbling people over time. According to him, the real focus, especially in the early and uncertain stages of building something, should be on conviction, presence, and the ability to take ownership of one’s space, even if that comes with a touch of swagger.
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Why can humility be limiting?
He pointed out that the world rarely operates in a supportive or encouraging way. Markets are indifferent, competition is intense, and rejection is often the default response. In such a setting, he suggested that what is often labelled as humility can turn into a limiting mindset, one that discourages people from pushing forward with conviction. For founders and professionals alike, especially those trying to grow in stagnant or challenging spaces, this approach may not always serve them well.Mittal drew from his own journey to explain this perspective. He shared that he faced multiple failures before finding success, and that it was not restraint or excessive self-doubt that carried him through those phases. Instead, it was a strong belief in his own ideas, even when they did not align with conventional logic or external validation. That sense of self-assurance, which some might interpret as ego or even arrogance, played a crucial role in helping him persist when circumstances were not in his favour.
He described this mindset as a necessary force, something that keeps individuals moving when they are up against resistance. It is the drive to prove doubters wrong, the confidence to believe that one’s perspective holds value, and the willingness to stand firm even when the broader system does not immediately validate it. Rather than dismissing ego entirely, he framed it as something that can be channelled productively when balanced with effort and resilience.
At the same time, his view does not dismiss the role of humility altogether. Instead, it places it in a different context, suggesting that life itself has a way of humbling people over time. According to him, the real focus, especially in the early and uncertain stages of building something, should be on conviction, presence, and the ability to take ownership of one’s space, even if that comes with a touch of swagger.
