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The rules of dating are quietly changing. Not long ago, physical appearance often dominated first impressions, how attractive someone looked, how polished their social media presence was, and how well they fit conventional beauty standards. But a noticeable shift is now underway, especially among Gen Z, where emotional connection is starting to outweigh surface-level appeal.

At the centre of this shift is a new, somewhat tongue-in-cheek trend called 'Shrekking.' While the name may sound humorous, the idea behind it reflects a deeper fatigue with modern dating culture. 

What Is 'Shrekking'?

'Shrekking' refers to the conscious choice of dating someone who may be considered average or less conventionally attractive, with the belief that they might offer stronger emotional availability and commitment. For many, it's less about lowering standards and more about redefining what truly matters in a relationship.

This perspective stems from a growing belief that people who are not constantly validated for their looks may invest more effort into building meaningful connections. While this idea may not hold true in every case, it has resonated with enough people to gain traction online.

How Social Media Fueled The Trend

Social media platforms have played a major role in amplifying the trend. Users began sharing personal experiences, claiming that partners who didn't fit traditional beauty ideals often turned out to be kinder, more attentive, and emotionally present. These anecdotes quickly gained popularity, giving rise to the now-viral term.

A Response To Dating Burnout

The rise of 'Shrekking' also reflects a broader dissatisfaction with today's dating landscape. Gen Z, in particular, has navigated a wave of complex relationship patterns, situationships, ghosting, and emotionally unavailable partners. These experiences have led many to prioritise qualities like reliability, respect, and emotional depth over physical attraction.

For many young daters now, the key question is no longer 'How attractive is this person?' but rather, 'Will this person show up for me?'