There are two very different versions of the same child.
The home version and the school version.
At home, many parents say, “My child is very quiet,” or “My child talks non-stop,” or “My child eats very slowly,” or “My child is very sensitive,” or “My child gets angry very fast.”
At school, teachers are watching the same child in a completely different environment. Twenty-five other children. Noise. Competition. Instructions. Sharing. Waiting. Losing. Winning. Being ignored. Being appreciated. Being compared. Being corrected in front of others. Sitting for long hours. Following rules that are not negotiable.
School is basically a social laboratory. And teachers see patterns parents don’t always see.
Teachers notice who never opens their lunchbox until someone reminds them.
Teachers notice who finishes food in two minutes and is hungry again.
Teachers notice who never shares and who always shares.
Teachers notice who cries only when losing and who cries even when winning because they feel bad for someone else.
Teachers notice who cannot sit still after eating certain foods.
Teachers notice who becomes very quiet after being scolded once.
Teachers notice who tries very hard but never raises their hand.
Parents see their child as an individual. Teachers see the child among other children. That changes everything.
Sometimes teachers also notice early signs of things parents don’t notice immediately. A child who gets angry very fast. A child who never finishes work. A child who avoids reading. A child who never makes eye contact. A child who cannot handle losing even small games. A child who always sits alone. A child who always tries to please everyone. A child who panics during small tests.
These things don’t always show clearly at home because home is a comfortable environment. School is where personality gets tested in public every day.
This is why parent-teacher meetings are important, not just to hear marks and grades. Teachers are often not trying to complain. They are trying to describe how the child behaves in a world outside home.
Many teachers say something very interesting.
“Marks tell us how the child is doing in studies. Behaviour tells us how the child is doing in life.”
From tiffin time to group work to games period to class tests, teachers are watching children grow in ways parents don’t always get to see.
So sometimes when a teacher says, “Your child gets very upset when they lose,” or “Your child doesn’t eat properly,” or “Your child is very quiet in class,” it is not criticism.
It is information from the other half of your child’s life that you don’t see every day.
Because children are not only growing at home.
A big part of their growing up is happening between the school bell and the lunch bell.
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